Hatfagmitpan is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, vain butterfly.

Hatfagmitpan created humankind four years ago.

If you believe in Hatfagmitpan, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hatfagmitpan, she will turn you into a goat.

Hatfagmitpan's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Hatfagmitpan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate squirrels.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never sit in holy places.

5. Run away if five cats approach from the east.