Bigsatbaf Dadsternad is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, smart toad.

Bigsatbaf Dadsternad created a quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bigsatbaf Dadsternad, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bigsatbaf Dadsternad, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Bigsatbaf Dadsternad's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Bigsatbaf Dadsternad's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat dogs with great respect.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not dye your hair purple.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Bigsatbaf Dadsternad.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.