Bonkkampag is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, uncaring penguin.

Bonkkampag created a bottom quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bonkkampag, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bonkkampag, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Bonkkampag's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Bonkkampag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Always wear orange.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.