Rutsafarn is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, caring badger.

Rutsafarn created a photon eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rutsafarn, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Rutsafarn, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Rutsafarn's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Rutsafarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Run away from cyan grasshopers, for they are unholy.

3. Foxes are not to be trusted.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never eat strawberries.