Nakvansog is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, humane porpoise.

Nakvansog created everything that exists five billion years ago.

If you believe in Nakvansog, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Nakvansog, it will be very unhappy.

Nakvansog's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Nakvansog's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured badgers.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never look at nebulae.

4. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a room before entering it.

5. Do not drink water in gray rooms.