Vidcatlatstigstigbestjarnwon Lippogkom is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, witless dragonfly.

Vidcatlatstigstigbestjarnwon Lippogkom created parasitic wasps four years ago.

If you believe in Vidcatlatstigstigbestjarnwon Lippogkom, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Vidcatlatstigstigbestjarnwon Lippogkom, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Vidcatlatstigstigbestjarnwon Lippogkom's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Vidcatlatstigstigbestjarnwon Lippogkom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sit in public.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never eat bananas.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force.