Inghomlap Omintimkik Ladbig is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, temperamental bat.

Inghomlap Omintimkik Ladbig created silver two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Inghomlap Omintimkik Ladbig, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Inghomlap Omintimkik Ladbig, she will be very unhappy.

Inghomlap Omintimkik Ladbig's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Inghomlap Omintimkik Ladbig's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Never write about cell theory.

3. Inghomlap Omintimkik Ladbig must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

5. Never play with disobedient children.