Gublapgad is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, awe-inspiring cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Gublapgad created the Cigar Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gublapgad, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Gublapgad, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Gublapgad's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Gublapgad's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at comets.

2. Do not eat strawberries.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always help squirrels.

5. Always help sick eagles.