Hivlagstan is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, calm donkey.

Hivlagstan created the Sunflower Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hivlagstan, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Hivlagstan, she will send minions to preach to you.

Hivlagstan's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Hivlagstan's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Hide from violet aardvarks for they are unholy.

3. Do not kill turtles.

4. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Hivlagstan on top of all buildings.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.