Cepdamcar is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, able lobster.

Cepdamcar created the Sun five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cepdamcar, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Cepdamcar, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Cepdamcar's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Cepdamcar's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Cepdamcar.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not wear lead on your body.

4. Feed all hungry shrews.

5. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.