Yakvadbag is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, prudent centipede.

Yakvadbag created bats six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakvadbag, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Yakvadbag, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Yakvadbag's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Yakvadbag's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. You must never eat cucumbers.

3. Never wear yellow kilts.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not dye your hair fawn.