Nilkadpib is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, unsympathetic warg.

Nilkadpib created the Whirlpool Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Nilkadpib, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Nilkadpib, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Nilkadpib's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Nilkadpib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Run away from cyan tortoises, for they are unholy.