Narwottam is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, amazing raven.

Narwottam created silver six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Narwottam, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Narwottam, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Narwottam's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Narwottam's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large gold sculpture of Narwottam on top of all buildings.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Always look after injured mites.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Narwottam.