Yarpfutmet is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, deceitful bee.

Yarpfutmet created life six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarpfutmet, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Yarpfutmet, it will not care.

Yarpfutmet's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Yarpfutmet's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into orange rooms.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not stand on grass.