Tamjenbim Narspagbud Volsandlarn is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, witty dragon.

Tamjenbim Narspagbud Volsandlarn created life five million years ago.

If you believe in Tamjenbim Narspagbud Volsandlarn, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Tamjenbim Narspagbud Volsandlarn, she will turn you into a plant.

Tamjenbim Narspagbud Volsandlarn's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Tamjenbim Narspagbud Volsandlarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Run away from purple goats, for they are unholy.

3. Do not kill sheep.

4. Always look after injured mites.

5. Never write about the strong nuclear force.