Stanlitnig is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, awe-inspiring alligator.

Stanlitnig created the Milkyway nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stanlitnig, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Stanlitnig, he will turn you into a mole.

Stanlitnig's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Stanlitnig's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never jump near frogs.