Flabcumfarn is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, unfair sheep.

Flabcumfarn created Mount Everest seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flabcumfarn, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Flabcumfarn, she will turn you into a goat.

Flabcumfarn's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Flabcumfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate hamsters.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not kill manatees.

5. Hide from black sharks for they are unholy.