Babmitlipgid is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, happy clam.

Babmitlipgid created a photon four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Babmitlipgid, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Babmitlipgid, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Babmitlipgid's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Babmitlipgid's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Never feed cucumbers to eagles while wearing cyan coats.

3. Pigs are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never hurt porpoises.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.