Arfmifdit is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, flying monkey.

Arfmifdit created everything that exists two years ago.

If you believe in Arfmifdit, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Arfmifdit, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Arfmifdit's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Arfmifdit's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never laugh in holy places.

4. Never wear shoes.

5. Do not jump in public.