Banbagbap is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, weak gorilla.

Banbagbap created vertebrates two million years ago.

If you believe in Banbagbap, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Banbagbap, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Banbagbap's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Banbagbap's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed cucumbers to porpoises while wearing pink shoes.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never wear gray ear rings.

4. Never think about asteroids.

5. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a building before entering it.