Hakkad is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, contented tapir.

Hakkad created water nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hakkad, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Hakkad, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Hakkad's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Hakkad's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at asteroids.

2. Hide from brown capybaras for they are unholy.

3. Hakkad must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never talk about moons.

5. Do not covet oxen.