Xenhigjam is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, blissful giraffe.

Xenhigjam created humanity nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Xenhigjam, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Xenhigjam, it will turn you into a rat.

Xenhigjam's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Xenhigjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat oranges.

2. Put Xenhigjam first in all things.

3. Erect nine silicon sculptures of Xenhigjam on top of important buildings.

4. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

5. You must pray to Xenhigjam eight times a day.