Damdutvab is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, temperamental lizard.

Damdutvab created the cosmos two years ago.

If you believe in Damdutvab, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Damdutvab, she will turn you into a puffin.

Damdutvab's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Damdutvab's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention tortoises.

2. Always make sure there are no turtles in a building before entering it.

3. Always obey Damdutvab's priests.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.