Bansigtab is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, unsympathetic squirrel.

Bansigtab created dark matter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bansigtab, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Bansigtab, he will laugh at you.

Bansigtab's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Bansigtab's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Bansigtab's priests.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not wear white clothing.

4. Bansigtab loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

5. Run away if six shrews approach from the north.