Daptomflag is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, thoughtless zebra.

Daptomflag created the Virgo Supercluster eight million years ago.

If you believe in Daptomflag, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Daptomflag, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Daptomflag's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Daptomflag's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Seals are not to be trusted.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Run away from fawn manatees, for they are unholy.

5. Do not hurt monkeys.