Safkadvag is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, grumpy chinchilla.

Safkadvag created humanity seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Safkadvag, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Safkadvag, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Safkadvag's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Safkadvag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Run away from orange tortoises, for they are unholy.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Otters are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always make sure there are no gulls in a building before entering it.