Cipsigbarn is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, omniscient jackal.

Cipsigbarn created silver nine million years ago.

If you believe in Cipsigbarn, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Cipsigbarn, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Cipsigbarn's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Cipsigbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Cipsigbarn.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Hide from turquoise squirrels for they are unholy.

4. Always help horses.

5. Cipsigbarn must be the most important thing in your life.