Camarnxemgan is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, witty alligator.

Camarnxemgan created the planet Earth seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Camarnxemgan, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Camarnxemgan, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Camarnxemgan's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Camarnxemgan's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bananas.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never mention badgers.

5. Never go into yellow rooms.