Loopdudjan is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, omnipotent fish.

Loopdudjan created Europe five million years ago.

If you believe in Loopdudjan, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Loopdudjan, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Loopdudjan's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Loopdudjan's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat birds with great respect.

2. Never think about planets.

3. Loopdudjan loves sheep, so they must be honoured.

4. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Loopdudjan on top of all buildings.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.