Yogontyarl is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, flying dolphin.

Yogontyarl created Asia nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Yogontyarl, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yogontyarl, he will try to impress you with trees.

Yogontyarl's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Yogontyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt porpoises.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Hide from indigo foxes for they are unholy.

4. Yogontyarl loves mites, so they must be honoured.

5. Never look in ponds.