Begmidfag is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, irritating slug.

Begmidfag created the Milkyway eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Begmidfag, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Begmidfag, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Begmidfag's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Begmidfag's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat cucumbers.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.