Larntettigam Dagwonbag is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, astonishing naga.

Larntettigam Dagwonbag created humanity two million years ago.

If you believe in Larntettigam Dagwonbag, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Larntettigam Dagwonbag, he will ignore you.

Larntettigam Dagwonbag's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Larntettigam Dagwonbag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never eat oranges.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never feed coconuts to great tits while wearing red hats.

5. Always wear mauve.