Jonbudwipbot is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, two-faced elephant.

Jonbudwipbot created water seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jonbudwipbot, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Jonbudwipbot, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Jonbudwipbot's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Jonbudwipbot's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry swans.

2. Never paint your arms orange.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Otters are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always obey Jonbudwipbot's priests.