Ganbidpangvog is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, selfish goat.

Ganbidpangvog created a charm quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Ganbidpangvog, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Ganbidpangvog, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Ganbidpangvog's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Ganbidpangvog's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Ganbidpangvog.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate geese.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always help sick ducks.

5. Snails are unholy and should not be approached.