Doglitgeb is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, witty dog.

Doglitgeb created water four billion years ago.

If you believe in Doglitgeb, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Doglitgeb, it will ignore you.

Doglitgeb's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Doglitgeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.