Homdamtengar Tikyimfum
is a god.
He takes the form of a gargantuan, vain
whale
.
Homdamtengar Tikyimfum
created the cosmos six thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Homdamtengar Tikyimfum
, he will look after you all your life.
If you do not believe in
Homdamtengar Tikyimfum
, he will torture you forever.
Homdamtengar Tikyimfum's
most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.
Homdamtengar Tikyimfum's Holy Commandments
1. Never wear stockings.
2. Hide from blue mice for they are unholy.
3. Do not hurt cats.
4. Never sing near ants.
5. Never pour water over plants.
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