Satstraggeb is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, charitable clam.

Satstraggeb created the Cigar Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Satstraggeb, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Satstraggeb, she will turn you into a sheep.

Satstraggeb's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Satstraggeb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

2. Retreat if six great tits approach from the north.

3. Do not take Satstraggeb's name in vain.

4. Feed all hungry tapirs.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Satstraggeb.