Dutbegfem Wadcemtail is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, kind dryad.

Dutbegfem Wadcemtail created the planet Saturn seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dutbegfem Wadcemtail, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Dutbegfem Wadcemtail, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Dutbegfem Wadcemtail's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Dutbegfem Wadcemtail's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never sing in the presence of doves.

3. You must pray to Dutbegfem Wadcemtail three times a day.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dutbegfem Wadcemtail.

5. Erect a large copper sculpture of Dutbegfem Wadcemtail on top of all buildings.