Quamtabrap Litpadsid Fomyarpged is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, intelligent clam.

Quamtabrap Litpadsid Fomyarpged created carbon six million years ago.

If you believe in Quamtabrap Litpadsid Fomyarpged, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Quamtabrap Litpadsid Fomyarpged, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Quamtabrap Litpadsid Fomyarpged's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Quamtabrap Litpadsid Fomyarpged's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Always help manatees in need.

3. Hide if six dogs approach from the west.

4. Do not dye your hair mauve.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.