Vil Rulvolcib Zenlargbaf is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, unsympathetic penguin.

Vil Rulvolcib Zenlargbaf created the Large Magellanic Cloud three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vil Rulvolcib Zenlargbaf, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vil Rulvolcib Zenlargbaf, it will turn you into a mouse.

Vil Rulvolcib Zenlargbaf's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Vil Rulvolcib Zenlargbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Vil Rulvolcib Zenlargbaf's priests.

2. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

3. Do not take Vil Rulvolcib Zenlargbaf's name in vain.

4. Never talk about asteroids.

5. Do not kill geese.