Ingzighasbunvag is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, bad-tempered slug.

Ingzighasbunvag created dark matter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Ingzighasbunvag, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Ingzighasbunvag, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Ingzighasbunvag's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Ingzighasbunvag's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine porpoises approach from the west.

2. Never mention ducks.

3. You must love Ingzighasbunvag.

4. Ingzighasbunvag loves geese, so they must be honoured.

5. Respect your elders.