Tomsandwit is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, merciless mole.

Tomsandwit created the planet Jupiter four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tomsandwit, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tomsandwit, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Tomsandwit's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Tomsandwit's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Hide from pink moths for they are unholy.

4. Always help doves.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.