Zakmifgut is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, cheerful naga.

Zakmifgut created the solar system two years ago.

If you believe in Zakmifgut, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Zakmifgut, he will turn you into a duck.

Zakmifgut's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Zakmifgut's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Do not hurt snails.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.