Damzigflow is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, selfish parrot.

Damzigflow created dark energy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Damzigflow, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Damzigflow, she will turn you into a hamster.

Damzigflow's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Damzigflow's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Damzigflow.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never think ill of sick tortoises.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Put Damzigflow first in all things.