Cummegveentan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, clever otter.

Cummegveentan created the cosmos four years ago.

If you believe in Cummegveentan, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cummegveentan, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Cummegveentan's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Cummegveentan's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate turtles.

2. Always wear violet.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

4. Never sing in the presence of snakes.

5. Do not wear aluminium on your body.