Gonfabhon is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, all-knowing wolf.

Gonfabhon created the Sun three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gonfabhon, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gonfabhon, it will turn you into a sheep.

Gonfabhon's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Gonfabhon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not bounce in public.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.