Cebmintag is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, dishonest yak.

Cebmintag created dark energy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cebmintag, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Cebmintag, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Cebmintag's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Cebmintag's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your chest brown.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.