Bapyarpgan Sadyartpid is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, contented wombat.

Bapyarpgan Sadyartpid created oxygen seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bapyarpgan Sadyartpid, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bapyarpgan Sadyartpid, it will refuse to believe in you.

Bapyarpgan Sadyartpid's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Bapyarpgan Sadyartpid's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate seals.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Hide from gray monkeys for they are unholy.

4. Feed all hungry doves.

5. Never pour water over plants.