Jigmetdossgep is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, selfish dingo.

Jigmetdossgep created dark energy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jigmetdossgep, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Jigmetdossgep, it will turn you into a mole.

Jigmetdossgep's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Jigmetdossgep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Hide from pink goats for they are unholy.

3. Run away if four ants approach from the south.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Put Jigmetdossgep first in all things.