Yarzigrencibpasjamvag is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, merciless unicorn.

Yarzigrencibpasjamvag created Asia six million years ago.

If you believe in Yarzigrencibpasjamvag, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Yarzigrencibpasjamvag, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Yarzigrencibpasjamvag's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Yarzigrencibpasjamvag's Holy Commandments

1. Swans are not to be trusted.

2. Never wear blue shorts.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Yarzigrencibpasjamvag on top of all buildings.